Tell Them You Are Bringing A Date

As someone who has been pretty much terminally single for his adult life, I don’t think issuing “and guest” invitations are mandatory for those planning a wedding. But the decision has to be uniform. Are you inviting everybody with a date or without a date? Are you inviting only married couples? Are you inviting only couples who’ve been in a relationship for a certain amount of time? Are you inviting only couples who are serious? 

What happens when you don’t invite everyone with an “and guest” invitation is that you start judging your guests and their significant others.

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Revenge For THe Solo invite

Here’s a great way to get back at a couple who didn’t invite you to their wedding with a date or as I call it “The Lack Of Date Invite”.

I know a married couple Joe and Jen who keep a list of who gave what at their weddings. When it’s time for their friend to get married Joe and Jen check the list to see what the friend gave at their wedding. The couple then gives a proportional gift when it’s the friend’s special day.

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Note From A Cool Bride

Yes, I am married and was brave enough not to fall for most of those stupid wedding ideas. However, I did do somethings that were ridiculous; I got married in the church and I’m not sure why I did that. The best thing I did was let my bridesmaid pick their own dresses, which I did not see until the day before the wedding. Because all I really cared about was being with the person I have known for 15 years of my life. 

Looking back I wouldn’t have done any of that shit. How could anyone be jealous, most brides are just naive.

My sister is getting married and she is the biggest bitch ever and she made me her “Maid of Honor”. I decided to take a stand and not be in the wedding party because she can’t seem to handle herself. By the way I think she also believes once she gets married it will solve all her problems. She’s also not talking to me because I won’t be in hthe wedding party. It’s the best decision I have ever made beside.

Tissues For Your Tears Of Joy

It’s been a growing trend to hand out “Tissues For Your Tears Of Joy” with the wedding programs at the ceremony. The trend has grown so much that there are directions on the web for making origami tissue packs so that these tissue packages will match your invitation paper.

It’s cocky to presume people are going to be crying tears of joy at your wedding.

Yes, people tend to cry at weddings. But you know what? There is no guarantee they will cry at YOUR wedding.

People often cry at funerals. Not everyone at my funeral will be sad. There will be at least one or two women who will say: “That a-hole deserved it. He made fun of my wedding.”

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Men Changing Last Name

There is a new and growing tradition that says women do not have to take the last name of their new husbands. You know what . . . if someone asked me to change my last name I don’t know if I would. If I had a daughter, I don’t know if I would want her to change her last name.

But here’s where I’m a hypocrite. I want the woman who will eventually be my wife to change her last name.

Why?

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A Groom’s Reply

This site is fantastic. 

I am getting married in October to a wonderful woman, but we have very different ideas about what a wedding is all about. 

She sees it as her “big day”. I see it as money that should be spent on buying a home. Every dollar that is spent on the wedding I see as flushed down the toilet. As my credit card bills increase, so does my frustration with the whole thing. Thankfully, she has attempted to save money where she can; however, I still see this as a rather large waste. I would’ve rather preferred a small, private wedding and a nice party afterwards. 

My suggestion to anyone reading this, or who finds themselves agreeing, is to speak up early, because when the wedding train starts moving, there ain’t no stopping it.
 

COVID / CORONA WEDDING TIPS

With group gatherings, seeming like a thing of the distant pass, even I, Tom Kelly the creator of I Hate Weddings.com . . . miss weddings.  I don’t miss the expense, cost and drama but I do miss my loved ones.  I miss seeing people happy.

Despite the emotional need for large family events, a badly planned wedding in 2020 and probably early 2021 is not only self-centered, it’s potentially deadly.

To help out Brides across America, I have restarted I Hate Weddings.com to prevent brides and grooms from turning the most self-centered days of their lives into murderous affairs.

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Opened My Eyes

Holy Smoke! IHateWeddings.com has really opened my eyes! 

I have always dreamed of giving my daughter a glorious wedding with all the trimmings. 

Reading all of this has made me realize that it was never for her really, it was for me. I wanted to look great because of all I was going to do. I wanted the applause for a job well done. I I I.

After reading the articles on this web-site about the MONSTER that weddings have become, I now see that I am a Frankenstein as well. 

I was going to create another monster. Your right, it IS about the union of the couple, NOT the ceremony or gifts. 

Thank you Tom Kelly, you have saved me thousands and spared me the hives and split lip that always comes from nerves with an event I put on!

Signed,

Kate (Mother Of A Bride)

Still Talking About Your Wedding

I saw a buddy after he came back from his honeymoon. All his wife could talk about was their wedding. The reception was three hours long. Her play by play recounting of the evening lasted five.

It is an affliction that cripples newlywed women every year. They realize their dream wedding is over and they have nothing left to look forward to in life. Subsequently, they keep talking about their wedding day over and over until someone ends up shooting themselves.

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ALCOHOL AND WEDDING TOASTS

Ever hear the phrase “expect the least from those who talk the most”? That phrase can be applied to yours truly, Tom Kelly, the creator of IHateWeddings.com when I had to give a toast at a wedding.  

I am not proud but I have given the worst toast in wedding history.  It wasn’t just bad.  It was offensive.

Mike never made me feel bad about it.  Even his wife just said “I hope you learned something from the experience.”

From my mistakes, I have LIFE LESSONS on how to mimimize toast disasters. 

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