No Bottles At The Wedding?

If you don’t want glass beer bottles at you wedding . . . fine. But there is a right way to do that. Before we talk about the right way to do it . . . let’s talk about my friend Jim’s wife Dianna.

There’s a lot of reasons why I love my friend Jim’s wife Dianna. But this is not the venue for me to be affectionate. Most relevant to you, the reader, I love Dianna because she said nice things about me on the meanings blog on earting had linked to the Sunday weddings article I had written where I stated “Most people would rather receive an envelope full of powdered anthrax than an invitation to a Sunday wedding.

Needless to say about a third of the Long Island Brides were angry.

In the middle of all of these comments calling me an ahole, a jerk who’s never been laid and many meaner things there was a comment from Dianna which read “Oh that’s my friend Tom.”

So I knew when I went to Jim and Dianna’s wedding I knew I had to love her for loving me.

The wedding was amazing. There are a few funny compliments I’ll give to them later. But I figured I’d first start with the one interesting thing I noticed.

When I went to order a beer the bartender took my beer and poured it into a small glass. He apologized and said “It was the bride’s wishes that we drink out of glasses and not bottles.”

I don’t begrudge that. I understand that this “bottleless tradition” is a way of keeping your pictures clear of Pabst Blue Ribbon cans and other low class corporate logos.

But the bartender at Chateau Le Mer in Lindenhurst, NY, who was quick to blame the bride, was serving the beer into tiny glasses. The tiny glasses were creating new problems. Even the most sober of men looked like they were quintuple fisting because they were ordering four glasses of beer to get the 16 fluid ounces found in an oh so tasty bottle of Heinekin.

If catering halls are going to enforce bottle-less weddings the halls need to implement some of these suggestions:

Serve beer out of a tap. You’ll waste less bottles. It’s “greener.”

Serve beer in larger glasses so that way I don’t have to order my beer three at a time to get 16 ounces of beer.

If you don’t follow these tips have an extra bus boy on hand to keep visiting my table because I’ll have a lot of glasses piling up.

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