With suggestions and help from actual I Hate Weddings.com readers, I have updated our “Signs You Are At A Trashy Wedding” list. This list includes suggestions from friends and I Hate Weddings.com readers.
If there’s something we forgot to add leave a comment and I’ll put it into version 3!
• The Bride does a keg stand.
• The Bride wears a bridal sweat suit.
• The Bride is pregnant and showing.
• The Bride does a kegstand.
• The Bride is pregnant, showing and does a keg stand.
• Instead of a band, Karaoke machine is rented.
• The Bride is pregnant and the groom doesn’t think he’s the father.
• The flower girl is the couple’s child.
• The flower girl is a child from a previous marriage.
• The Bride’s father is so drunk she has to drag him down the aisle.
• The maid of honor is baby momma to two of his kids.
• Bridal party arrives in Ford F 150.
• The venue has Fluorescent lighting
• The Bride’s mother catches the bouquet.
• The Bride’s sixteen year old sister catches the bouquet.
• Someone brought the bachelor party stripper as a date.
• The reception is held at the same place as the bachelor party.
• All of the horderves are served on Triscuits.
• At some point, the police are called.
• There is a cash bar at the wedding.
• The junior bridesmaid is pregnant.
• There is a shot girl walking around at the reception.
• The bride or groom calls when they can’t find your wedding gift.
• Garterbelt ceremony felt like watching a sex video
• It is a Sunday night wedding.
• The wedding was on a Thursday.
• The bride’s perverted old uncle gets smashed and starts hitting on the bridesmaids.
• Guests are invited based on their income level rather than relationship to the couple.
• Buffet Dinner
• The only food served is Barbeque.
• The only beverage served is Bud or Pabst Blue Ribbon.
• At the end of the reception the bride and groom launch some fireworks in the parking lot.
• The entire event was paid for on the groom’s maxed out Visa card.
• After the honeymoon, the bride will be moving in with the groom and his mom.
• The bride/groom compares diamond sizes with another woman.
• The groom/bride is marrying his/her first boyfriend/girlfriend.
• The bride quits her job just before the wedding.
• The bride invites her ex-boyfriend, who brings his new girlfriend that bears an uncanny resemblance to the bride.
• The groom is stalking the bride’s friend.
• Everyone knows that the Bride has a problem with pills.
• Everyone but the bride knows the groom had sex with a stripper at the bachelor party.
• The bride and groom are on welfare . . . yet they scraped together enough for a big party.
• The “church”/”venue” would be the local white-trash/bogan bar – a true marvel and shrine for all white-trash pilgrims to reach to make their lives complete ..The Bride and Groom would get married where the karaoke machine is.
• The groom grabs the bride’s ass during their perfunctory “zombie shuffle” first dance
• Someone shows up in a polo shirt or flannel.
• You get an Evite to the ceremony only.